525,600 minutes

I realized I hadn't posted a personal blog in a while. I should, in case anyone actually reads this.

I hate endings. I know they're a necessary and natural part of life, but I don't like them. I also know that when anything ends, it opens up a door for something new to begin, and that's great; but I still find endings difficult and beginnings intimidating.

There are a lot of endings on my mind lately. One thing I absolutely hate about my line of work is having to say goodbye to kids. It's in my nature/nurture-induced character to attach easily to people, and that makes goodbyes really, really difficult. As a teacher, every May I'm forced to say goodbye, and sometimes even before then.

I think I can say at this point without any air of secrecy that it's been a rough year for Jonesville. In April, we said goodbye to an assistant principal who encouraged me throughout my first two years of teaching, and an administrative assistant with one of the biggest hearts in the world. On the first of May, we lost our art teacher unexpectedly to a plethora of health issues that culminated in what seemed like an untimely death. And in the past couple of months, we've had to get used to the idea that our amazing principal will be leaving us for the high school when the year ends. This, in addition to the usual goodbyes that the end of the year imposes, has sort of overloaded me emotionally.

To top it off, I have another bittersweet goodbye in order; I learned last week that I will no longer be teaching at Sims. At this point I'm slated to split my days between Jonesville and Lockhart next year, but that could change before August. I learned a lot during my year at Sims, I grew as a teacher, and I became close to a few students, though not quite so many as I have at Jonesville. I will miss those kids, as well as the administrators who have been so graciously welcoming and encouraging to me this year. However, I think the two smaller schools will be a better fit for me, since I grew up in a small school and tend to prefer closer-knit environments. Still, my dream teaching situation would be to stay at Jonesville full-time like I did my first year. (But don't get me wrong; I'm grateful to have a job, especially in a time like this, and I think the change will be a positive one.)

Tomorrow my Jonesville 8th graders will graduate, and I will reluctantly say goodbye to several of them. I didn't get as close to this graduating class as a whole (not by a longshot in comparison to last year's group), but there's a handful that I'll really and truly miss.

I guess it's Jonesville tradition for a chorus of 8th graders to sing at graduation, and last year I became involved in the preparations for this (which is now apparently becoming tradition as well). A chorus that included some of my favorites sang "For Good" from Wicked, and I bawled like a baby at the lyrics that rang so true of these kids. This year some of my favorites will sing "Seasons of Love" from Rent (when I'm involved, you'd better bet there will be Broadway!), and like last year, I'm getting emotional about it. I've always been hit pretty hard by the lyrics. That goes double for this year.

525,600 minutes
525,000 moments so dear.
525,600 minutes
how do you measure, measure a year
In daylights, in sunsets, in midnights, in cups of coffee
In inches, in miles, in laughter, in strife
In 525,600 minutes
how do you measure a year in the life
How about love
Measure in love
Seasons of love
525,600 minutes
525,000 journeys to plan
525,600 minutes
how can you measure the life of a woman or man
In truths that she learned
Or in times that he cried
In bridges he burned
Or the way that she died
It's time now to sing out
Though the story never ends
let's celebrate
remember a year in the life of friends
How about love
Measure in love
Seasons of love
In diapers, report cards
in spoke wheels
in speeding tickets
in contracts
in dollars
in funerals and births.
525,600 minutes
how do you figure our last year on earth
figure in love
measure in love


How do you measure a year? Especially a year as eventful as this one has been. I think it will suffice to say that I'll measure this year in memories. And by that scale, it's definitely been a big one.